The Kids Are Doing Well

A pleasant surprise for everyone: my kids are adjusting and behaving rather well.  We have been able to visit my grandparents several times.  Only once did we have to leave because the kids couldn’t behave.  Other than that, at all the family parties and functions, the kids did well.  I’ve received some nice compliments from some very critical family members.  Yes, there were also some ludicrous comments.  I can’t escape that.  Like when my cousin (who is 15 mo old) was screaming (which he does well) and my aunt said, “Your last name is Henry not your first name!”  But David did rather well.  Of course, to be on the safe side, I put David’s “I’m Autistic…” shirt on when it was time for my cousin’s engagement party.  That way, when surrounded by all the people I didn’t know, and all the people–including family–who aren’t used to David, they would know he’s Autistic and I wouldn’t just be making excuses for any unacceptable behavior.

Slow Progress

Each day is a struggle to wake up, let alone pack.  And each time I leave the kids to pack something, I emerge five minutes later feeling elated that one box has something in it, only to find that David has either: dumped a 1000 piece puzzle, or shredded Styrofoam into tiny balls, or dumped the leeetle Legos, or helped himself to the last few chocolate morsels in the house, or gotten out scented bubble mix and then left it unattended where Henry found it and then tried to blow bubbles but spilled it, or decided to go to the car to get something and since our storm door has no latch the dog let herself out and ran away across the road and across the college campus to a point where I no longer see her…   At which point I feel like I’ve taken 2 steps backward.

Today I left the house at 2 o’clock and didn’t return until 7:20.  First the kids and I went to McDonald’s Playland.  I had hoped Amanda could come, but since they’re moving tomorrow, they were very busy today.  Around 4 we left McDonald’s and went to Wal-Mart.  I was fried from…well, life, so I told the kids well in advance that we were not, under ANY circumstances going to the toy aisle.  And since we’ve had 2 Code Adams in the last couple weeks, I put my “safety belt” on David.  In reality, it is a dog collar meant for a very large dog, reduced to fit David’s or Daniel’s waists, with a 5-foot dog leash attached.  He’s too big for a toddler harness, so I had to get creative.  I used to have one that even had an oval ring that screwed closed keeping the leash on the collar.  David can open a clip.

Wal-Mart went better than expected.  He had only one major melt down.  He had a few tantrums.  He called me “jerk” maybe 5 times, and “idiot” about 3 times.  It was less than at McDonald’s…  I had to put him in the cart during his major melt down, but since Henry was napping at home while Scott packed, it wasn’t too big a deal.  It only took a few minutes till he stopped trying to punch me and call me names till he was making his high pitched “me-me-me-me” sound and reaching out for a hug.  He apologized.  I let him down.  We got our few groceries, looked at a few other things, and then left.  We didn’t look at toys at ALL !

We then ran the groceries home and since Henry was still napping, we continued on without him.  We went to Amanda’s new house.  It was probably 5:30 when I got there.  The kids were LOUD.  There were doors slamming.  Kids hiding in closets.  Kids screaming.  Kids walking toys on walls (that would really just be Daniel).  Kids fighting.  Kids crying over hurt feelings.  And no, they wouldn’t take their playing outside.  No matter how many times we laid down the rules, David and Daniel kept getting carried away and getting everyone in trouble.  And because of stress and exhaustion, Celia and Caedmon are both extra dramatic and moody.

Suddenly it was after 7 and Scott was asking what was for dinner.  Amanda and I both balked at the time and decided Pizza Hut buffet sounded easy as long as the husbands agreed.  They did.  We all raced over.  All 10 of us.   All the parents were tired, and all the kids continued to be loud.  Then, at the end of our meal, a major storm blew in.  The rain was going sideways.  We decided to have a refill and wait till it eased up.  Which just meant more of us telling the kids to stay seated.

And tomorrow I do it all over again.  Because while I was away, Scott got a decent amount of packing done.  Without the kids, it went much more smoothly.  I just don’t know what I’m going to do with them tomorrow!

Checkups

On Friday Celia and David saw the Pediatric Developmental Specialist in Lubbock for the last time.  When the nurse, Jesus (Hay-Zeus), called our name to go back, Celia was in the bathroom.  David and Daniel rushed to Jesus and I walked toward the door and told him we were waiting on her.  The door closed.  I could hear Jesus tell them that we had to wait for mom.  But I couldn’t see what was happening.

Celia emerged and we joined Jesus and the boys.  Henry was buckled into his stroller, so he was no problem at all.  Jesus immediately said that when he told them they were waiting on me, David stopped and waited.  He said he was impressed at how well David is doing.  I was beaming with pride.

After weighing and measuring the kids, we were taken back to an examination room.  Luckily we didn’t wait too long.

The doctor came in and began with David.  Celia stood right next to me, and couldn’t stop trying to interject information about her own life.  I tried listening to her in hopes that she would calm down, but to no avail.  Finally I said to her that the doctor was focusing on David right now and she would have her chance soon.  The noise in the room from the three boys was deafening.  I’m amazed the doctor and I could talk at all!  But we did.

She asked how school was going for David.  I said we’ve taken a time out because of the move.  But he has a great interest in learning to read, and in all areas he’s progressing.  He’s been coloring and writing more.  His speech is improving.  He knows the phonics sounds to most of the letters.  He is recognizing bigger, smaller, same, and different.  And he’s answering questions better.  Then the doctor asked where David is receiving therapy.  I answered that I’ve been doing it all myself.  (Services in this area aren’t worth the battle with the insurance company!)  But all in all, the Risperdal and Strattera seem to be doing well with David’s ASD.

Finally time for Celia.  She asked about school.  I said she finished the year well and is excited about homeschooling.  But we’ve taken time off because of the move.  The doctor asked if there were any academic concerns.  I said no.  Celia makes very good grades.  And I told her that her first grade teacher never told me until I asked her, but her attention improved at the end of the year, and Celia left her seat less often.  (I had no idea she was having a hard time staying seated!!!)  So, the Strattera is helping Celia.

During the entire visit, in the background, David and Daniel both wanted the Larry Boy stuffed toy.  I ended up having to set the timer on my phone for 5 minutes and make them trade.  The arguing and fighting ended.  As soon as the timer beeped (which was really annoying in the small room) you would hear, “Here you go…” and then Larry Boy would trade hands.  No head locks.  No scratching.  No punching.  Just sharing.

The doctor seemed very pleased with what she saw and heard from Celia and David.  I was very happy myself.

Method to My Madness

Lately I’ve been asked a lot of questions about autism, or therapy, or signing to my children, or eating or sleeping habits of special needs kids… And the list goes on. I’ve been trying to tackle the issues that people seem to want to know about. The result is a combination of chronological journaling and random posts about past major issues.

But what I really want, is for my blog to minister to people’s needs. Whether the need be completely superficial and just wanting to know what size knitting needle I used on Celia’s top, or if someone wants to know more intimate details, like just how many lipsticks David has completely wasted.

So, dear public, I am here to welcome questions. I want to raise knowledge and understanding of autism and other disorders. I want to help people that are also beginning this journey. I can offer empathy and also a long list of books to read!

Monday is Celia’s favorite day

Celia began school this morning bright and early. I wasn’t ready. She began by bringing me a math curriculum book and telling me to give her ten pages to do. I said we’d start with two. I chose the first page from chapter 9 and from chapter 10. Money and time. Something I don’t think they did this year in public school. The first 8 chapters were unbelievably easy. This was a book they sent home from school with the kids. I guess to keep them remembering their math over the summer. But chapter 1 begins with writing the numbers and counting. This is for kids preparing to enter second grade. Give me a break.

So, after Celia did both sides of the worksheets, she wanted more work. Since I wasn’t ready for school today, I had to rummage to find the next sheets in the A Beka curriculum I had used before. It is labeled 1st grade, but it is new material and harder than what she had at public school. Part of her one sheet was filling in statements. She wrote: My favorite day of the week is Monday. She showed it to me and explained that Monday was her favorite because Mom and Monday both start with M, and one week she and I had a special day just the two of us and it was on a Monday.

The next part of school was baking a banana cake. She read the recipe, and retrieved the ingredients. She also had to find the proper measuring cups and spoons. She counted it all out. Before I added the egg, she got a small taste of it. She did a great job. I really didn’t have to correct her much at all. (I had to show her that the recipe called for 1 and 1/4 cups of sugar, and not just 1/4. The “and” was implied.)

While the cake baked, we played Number Rings (a Discovery Toys) game. Then we finished our novel about Amelia Erhart: First Lady of Flight. It is listed as Juvenile Fiction. As I read, I instructed Celia to draw a picture of her favorite part of the book. Her picture was of Amelia landing on Gardner Island (incidentally, that was not something discussed in the book). After finishing it, I decided to go on the internet and look for more information. I had never known so much about her before. Celia was sad to learn that she had died. She liked to think that she landed on Gardner Island instead of Howland Island and survived. Thing is, no matter what happened, she did die. In 1940, a man found a tall, thin, white woman’s skeleton under a tree on Gardner Island. Nearby was a shoe circa 1930’s that matched the type of shoes seen in photos of Amelia from her round the world trip. Also found was a man’s shoe (presumably her navigator’s). Celia then said she wanted to change her picture. She didn’t like to think of her crashing after that.

After lunch we all got to sample the cake. Delicious!

Then Celia was free. She chose to play on the computer.

And it was David’s turn for school. He did lesson 4 in reading (Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons). And then wrote “s”, “a”, and “m”. He couldn’t do an “s” without hand-over-hand help. He attempted an “a” for the first time. And “m” wasn’t even part of school today, but he did it just because he wanted to! And there are some good m’s in there! Then he told me about the picture in his Little Critter reading workbook (ISBN 1577685997BT), and then drew pictures hand-over-hand of Sonic the hedgehog, Shadow, and Knuckles. Math (ISBN 1577685091BT) was putting 4 pictures in order from smallest to biggest. I had him cut them out–and his final cut was 95% on the line!!! Then I put glue stick on a piece of construction paper and let him place them in order. He did great. We had to talk about which was bigger, Litter Critter’s cat or dog, but he was correct with the cricket and the mouse without any help at all.

I was so proud of how great both of them did with school today! It left me feeling elated!

Strattera is going well!

Well, I’ve had nothing but positive feedback from everyone involved with my kids. I didn’t tell people we’d started Strattera. I just asked how it was going. The librarian said David did really well the last few weeks. At church today they seemed excited how well David did. They said he did excellent. This past Wednesday, Celia’s school walked to the playground. We met them there for some shared playtime. In talking to her teacher, she said Celia finished out the school year very well. I asked if her attention improved. She thought half a moment, and said, “Yes. She did seem to leave her seat less and fidget less.” This was all new to me. She had never mentioned before that there were any issues with leaving her seat and fidgeting. I had asked about chattering back in February, and the teacher had said it’s not too little that we’d have to worry about social issues, and not so much as to be a distraction. That was the same day she casually mentioned that Celia had attention concerns. Of course, I said it first and she agreed. Then I was told that the 3 F’s she received her first week of school were a direct result. I knew that her spelling F was because of it, but she didn’t tell me that Celia stopped mid-reading to ask questions about what sex the horses were and what their names were. That was why Celia scored 27 words per minute instead of closer to the required 40.

Anyway, enough of a vent. School is done. I intend to return to homeschooling. I would take a break, but Celia wants to start up right away. In fact, when we got home from school on Friday, she asked if she could start homeschool right then. She said she’d like 10 sheets of work! I said we’ll see. We ended up doing fun stuff to celebrate the end of school, instead.

Personally I’ve seen growth in Celia’s ability to follow a two-part command. She has also been a bit more trust worthy in getting herself ready for the day. I spent months sitting next to her in the bathroom walking her through each step of how to get ready for school. Things a typical 7 year old should know.

With David, I think it has quelled some of his hyper-activity. Not all mind you, but some. I didn’t want to stop it all anyway. I just wanted a little help.

This morning he sat in his chair at church during praise and worship. During the final song, he came to be held. His legs hung to my knees, but I didn’t care. I was worshiping God and feeling so very thankful for my children. I was praising God for everything that has been going so well. I was thanking Him that my ADD daughter was enjoying holding her Cabbage Patch kids while listening to praise and worship. I was thanking Him that my ASD son was allowing me to hold and cuddle him. I was thanking Him that no matter what we may go through in the upcoming months, I will always have their love and His love.

Trial and Error

Celia was getting really difficult again. I was really frustrated. Even Amanda was at the end of her rope. Honestly. When we were all at Target, Amanda considered telling Celia that if she didn’t stop the way she was acting, they were not going to eat dinner with us. No amount of talking, understanding, threatening, or cajoling would get her to behave. It was a rough night. She was upset because the Cabbage Patch Doll she wanted, Carmen, was no longer there. I hugged her. I talked her through it. I offered another doll. I suggested she wait till we find the perfect one. I even let her call for help to ask if there were any others. Unfortunately help never arrived. We were all horribly tired and wanted to eat. Presley, Amanda’s daughter, and Henry were especially fussy. We needed to leave. Celia lost it. I promised her that we would at the very least go to Wal-Mart that night and look there. After a particularly rough dinner, I took them to Toys-R-Us. We went straight to the Cabbage Patch Dolls. We hardly looked at anything else. Yet Celia was still upset. She just wanted to get one but wasn’t happy with any of the ones available. And I still kept my promise and took her to Wal-Mart. It was the end of the night. It was after 9 on a Friday night. All the kids were losing it. So, we left without a Cabbage Patch.

Day after day of this behavior, I didn’t know what to do with her. Amanda asked if she was always like this. It’s part of the reason she started public school back in February. But things lately had been really good. I’ve been really enjoying days off of school and looking forward to the end of school.

It was Amanda who suggested that the Strattera was making her tired. I had noticed that since going on Strattera, David had taken a few naps. After all, if it made him tired enough to take naps, then perhaps it was making her that tired too. And since she’s in school, there’s no opportunity for her to nap. And she’s 7. Who wants to waste the day napping? So, I’ve switched them to taking it at night. What a difference it makes! Celia and David are both doing so much better.

Well, here I am blogging…

Okay, I must admit. I never thought I’d be blogging. I mean never. But I was invited to read my best friend’s son’s blog. Adorable. Then I linked to my friend’s blog. Just to comment on her blog I had to create an account. Well, I was half way done. Once I had an account, why not go the rest of the way and just create my very own blog? And another reason for my blogging is that I will moving soon. Why not begin allowing people to keep up with us by just reading my blog? After all, I am doing a terrible job at telling everyone what’s been going on.

As to what’s going on, my 7 year old daughter was just diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and Inattentive Type ADD. We’re trying her on Stratera. My 5 year old son (aka Chaos) has Autism. And now we’ve decided to try him on Stratera as well. That’s his second daily medication. The other is Risperdal. It helps keep down his violence. Notice I only said helps. Not stops. Only helps. My 3 year old (aka Mayhem) is OCD as well, though too young to diagnose. Other than that he is a rather defiant and stubborn little soul. My last–but not least–child is now 21 months old. He is more than able to hold his own amongst the rest of my offspring. He loves superheroes and capes and swords and lightsabres as much as his brothers.

I lightly mentioned that we’ll be moving. We’ll be gone by June 30th. The catch is, we don’t know where we’re going. The resumes that are out right now are to: Virginia Commonwealth Univ, Southern Connecticut, Clarion State (in PA), and Mansfield State (also in PA). I think there are other resumes out, but those four are the main ones. My husband is a track and field coach. He is a good coach. He has good ethics, integrity. (The only thing he doesn’t have is the ability to show his fine qualities while at home.)

Over all, we share a happy home. It’s just full of Chaos and Mayhem…